Caution: Smartphone Zombies Crossing
If you're one of those people that can't stand it when someone can't take their eyes off their phone, then this is the sign for you. Someone put up a sign in a neighborhood that asked people to "beware of smartphone zombies." It's probably just asking drivers to be careful and be on the lookout for pedestrians that aren't paying attention, but it's pretty funny nonetheless. It's also a good way to get drivers to pay attention to the sign.
Now, if only they could figure out a way to get people from becoming entranced by their phones while walking down the road. You might see a sign like this coming to a street near you soon enough.
When You Use Google Translate to Write Your Signs
This post actually contains multiple funny signs. We're not sure where exactly it is or why it even exists, but we're glad it does. The first sign in the photo advises people to call the police if they're stolen, which might be hard for obvious reasons but anyway. Our favorite is probably the sign in the back, though. It reads: "Avoid rude and unreasonable chicken."
Whoever wrote that must've already mastered life by now. Another advises people to keep safe because "the slippery are very crafty." They sure are, they sure are.
He's Always Watching
If you ever wanted to make someone feel weirded out and like they are constantly being watched, just put this sign up in your place. It's basically a sign that looks like Jesus with text that says, "I saw that." It'll even hang conveniently from your door if you have nowhere else to put it. We've never felt so guilty for doing so little after looking at this sign.
It's also hard not to imagine there is a small camera installed somewhere in this sign. Placing a small, discrete fake camera somewhere on here might be the only way to make it better.
Everybody Loves A Good Pun (or Three)
If puns aren't your thing, then you might want to pay special attention to this sign because we promise it will make you a pun lover. And if you already love puns, then you're welcome. Someone wrote this sign for what is seemingly a bar. It reads: "Alcohol is not in my Vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on Whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much, it's likely Tequilya." That's pretty great.
However, despite the great puns throughout this sign, it's probably not the best business practice for a bar to remind its customers that the alcohol they're being served is likely to make them hit the bucket earlier.
This Is Why Punctuation and Grammar Are Important
There have already been a couple of signs on this list with some grammar mistakes, but none quite like this. The sign is in bright red, and it reads exactly: "Elephants please stay in your car." It's not hard to guess that someone wanted to warn people to stay in their cars because there might be elephants nearby. However, without punctuation, it reads as if it's asking elephants to stay in their cars.
We all know elephants don't drive, so it's not hard to get the meaning, but it does show what can happen when you remove the odd comma or two.
$200 Fine (if You Don't Kick the Bucket First)
This sign gets pretty serious pretty quickly. However, it then just makes you second guess everything about it. The sign warns people against touching wires, which it says causes "instant death." It even has the skull and bones adorned on either side. However, it then tells you that there will be a "$200 fine" for such actions. How would there be a fine if you're likely to be dead instantly?
Also, where is the Newcastle Tramway Authority? That sounds like a place in the U.K., but if so, why would they be using a dollar figure instead of pounds? So many questions here.
Cats Are Teenagers in Animal Form
If you're looking to drive traffic to your veterinary clinic, this sign might be your answer. It explains that dogs prepare people for babies while cats prepare parents for teenagers. And while dogs are great, they're still sort of like large, clumsy babies, which is part of the reason we love them so much. Cats, on the other hand, are a different story. They can be moody and anti-social, just like teenagers.
We aren't sure if this sign was the work of an employee or the business owner but hats off to whoever came up with it because it really does capture the difference between dogs and cats.
We Also Can't Believe They Had to Make This Sign
When you go out into nature for something like a camping or hiking trip, it's general knowledge that you should dig a hole and use the bathroom there if you need to. However, this park was apparently having issues with people going between the massive stone boulders. And nobody wants to come across human waste during their hiking down a trail. The sign even laments the fact they had to put a sign up in the first place.
It reads: "Please do not poop in the rocks." A disclaimer follows: "We can't believe we had to make this sign." They really sound fed up with people going on the trail.
Armed Dinosaurs? No. Dinosaurs With Flowers? Yes
We aren't too sure who this sign's target audience is, nor are we sure where exactly it was hanging, but it's pretty hilarious nonetheless. It shows a T-rex holding two pistols with a forbidden symbol in red on the left. On the right, the T-rex is holding flowers inside, a symbol showing that this is allowed. So, yeah, we aren't sure if this would deter an adult from bringing a gun somewhere, but it might encourage a small child to swap out their handgun for some roses.
It's also a mystery as to how this T-rex was able to pick up either gun or flower with those tiny arms, but it looks hilarious holding either.
Teacher Of The Year (Not)
Teachers are arguably some of the best when it comes to making hilarious signs, but we've never seen a classroom sign with the same level of dry humor as this. A music teacher made a list apologizing for being "a mean, demanding, and slightly obsessive music teacher." They also promised to "try to be nicer in the future" before informing their students that the above "are lies" and that they should go practice more.
The teacher might be slightly obsessive, but with a sign like this, we wouldn't mind having them teach us a thing or two about music. It just shows that they're dedicated.
It's Just Chemistry, Man
No smoking signs are pretty common these days. The logic is simple, but there might be instances where people just seem to completely ignore such signs. This dock owner had a pretty clever way of conveying his no-smoking rule to customers, and he did it using the most simple terminology possible. His sign reads: "Absolutely no smoking, fire + fuel = kaboom!" It's pretty hard to put it anymore, but then that.
However, knowing people, we'd be surprised if every single person to dock here ended up following the rule. Smoking is just one of those things that are hard to control.
Someone's Been Bullying the Staff
Apart from being one of the most random signs on this list, it probably has one of the best backstories. Sadly, we don't know the backstory, but the sign itself reads: "Please do not throw cabbages at our staff." Why the employees would put this up in a random spot in the freezer or even put it up at all is anyone's guess.
However, it now begs the question of what can you throw at the staff if not for cabbage? Those other items in the freezer look a bit hard.
Who Said It's Only for Happy Hour?
Restaurant signs are usually pretty dull. They might list their item of the day, a special, or that they're hiring. However, this restaurant managed to find a way to grab people's attention while giving them exactly what they wanted. The sign simply reads "Soup of the day," followed by the word "tequila." It's smart because many of the people going to a restaurant called Little Mexico are probably in the mood for drinks involving that particular ingredient, anyway.
Of course, a sign like this doesn't bode well for the quality of their food, but when you have tequila, who really cares, right?
We're Pretty Sure You're Not Allowed to Sell That
Someone out shopping for some furniture spotted this jumbled collection of words. It reads, and in this order: "Buy Bed Free 1 Night Stand". We're guessing it means that you get a free nightstand, as in a table, if you buy a bed. However, it's not hard to imagine an alternate meeting for this particular set of words. We'll let you figure this one out. Hint: they definitely shouldn't be advertising that.
You kind of understand what they mean to say, but it's still funny nonetheless.
Guilting People Into Happy Hour? Genius Marketing
Mexican restaurants really seem to know their customer base. This sign from a restaurant called El Arroyo in Texas reads: "Treat your mom to a margarita. You're probably the reason she drinks." It's kind of hard to argue with that logic, especially if, like some people, you were only going there for the drinks, anyway. We're sure their food is good, but how could you not have a margarita or two while you're there?
Some people who saw this sign were quick to point out how the sign should've included husbands on that list of why people drink. But that's just another sign idea for another time.
They Definitely Should've Written GOLF Balls
Golf courses aren't usually known for their sense of humor. When you picture a golf course, the first thing that usually comes to mind is a stuffy country club. However, this golf course sign proves they aren't all like that. It reads: "Coronavirus Be Aware" at the top, followed by "Do not touch other players balls. Wash your hands after touching your own balls!" We'll let you make of that what you will.
We're surprised someone managed to get this sign past management, but we're glad they did. A little sense of humor is needed when trying to get people to pay attention to virus precautions.
The Clarification We All Needed
It's not every day you have a conversation in your head with a pair of doors. But that's exactly what these two signs make you do as soon as you start reading them. The sign on the right door seems normal enough and advises people to use the other door. However, the sign on the left door reads: "I am the other door." It's kind of hard not to just feel like you were talking to an actual person there.
It's also kind of hard not to start searching for a deeper meaning in the wording used for this set of signs. Does the door on the left feel used? Is there something else going on here?
We Had No Idea This Is How Wind Chimes Are Made
This sign might be the most creative one yet. Someone hung a sign in a store above some wind chimes, which explains the popular product's backstory. It reads, "Wind chimes are made from the metallic bones of robots that tried to overthrow us. Hang them outside your house as a warning to others." It's a little dark, but to be honest, that's what makes it so hilarious and unexpected.
Of all the items to link to a robot apocalypse, wind chimes actually make the most sense. We're going to think back to this sign every time we hear wind chimes from now on.
This Mile Marker Says "419.99" Because "420" Kept Getting Stolen
Here is another case of government employees having to get a bit inventive in order to get people not to do something. Colorado is one of the few states in the U.S. to legalize the sale of a particular plant beloved by some, so it's not really a surprise that mile marker 420 kept getting stolen. So, in order to keep people from stealing their sign and also mark the road, they put up a mile marker that read: "Mile 419.99".
However, to be honest, this is probably the only mile marker 419.99 in the entire country, so one would think that anyone who wants a really unique sign would be dying to snatch this one up.
Case In Point
To be perfectly clear, we're not sure if this sign was intended to be this way, if someone ran it over with a car, or if it really was hit by a plane. It warns people that there are low-flying aircraft in the area, and the sign itself has been completely run over by something. If it truly was a plane, then that's kind of crazy because these things are at most 10ft in height.
With that said, something had to hit it going pretty fast because instead of bending, the metal sign just completely snapped at its base. And anyone who has ever tried to steal a sign can tell you that's pretty hard to do. We guess the evidence indicates it was, indeed, an airplane.
Whoever Made This Deserves Employee of the Month
Stocking inventory and changing out displays can get repetitive. That's probably why this employee decided to spice things up a little by mislabeling the bananas as "long yellow things." Either that or they simply had enough and decided to give literally zero effort at all towards this sign. Seeing signs like this in the grocery store does make you wonder what led up to something like this happening, though.
Was it truly a disgruntled employee? Or did the workers simply want to see if anyone would notice if they put this sign up? At least they converted the price-to-weight ratio for anyone not familiar with imperial.
The Pharmacy Has Jokes, Too
While most of the signs on this list seemed to be written in a purposely funny way, this is not one of them. Someone spotted this sign that was placed inside a pharmacy, and it says that the store is a "drug-free workplace." While that's all well and good for most places of work, a pharmacy is usually the only "legal" place you go to find substances.
We're sure whoever put this sign up was referring to the bad type of substances, but it's still pretty funny to see this sign at the pharmacy.
We Will No Longer Be Using the Term "skunk"
A sense of humor seems mandatory if you find yourself working at a park. This park sign warns people not to pet the "fart squirrels," and it shows a picture of a skunk. We never actually thought about it before, but that's pretty much all they are. Also, we didn't know that skunks will just walk close enough to random people in order to be petted.
Aren't wild animals supposed to naturally be afraid of humans? Perhaps this is a recurring problem, which might explain the hilarious sign and the need for it in the first place.
We'd for Sure Turn Right
This sign is kind of funny for a couple of different reasons. It looks like a taco shop just placed it on their corner, and it basically gives pedestrians two choices if they happen to come across it. There is an arrow that says "tacos" and points one way, while another arrow reads: "no tacos" and points the other way. Of course, if given this choice, you're going to pick the arrow that says "tacos."
However, the street is one way anyway, so if you happen to be driving through, then you really don't have a choice in the matter. That's how you pick your store location.
Comfort Food Is Good for Road Safety
It's always great to see one of those electronic signs on the highway lit up with some funny text. It just reminds you that there's actually a real person somewhere typing those messages out. However, we don't think that this one was intentionally funny. Instead, it sort of looks like a typo. It reads: "Winter conditions. Drive with cake". While we certainly don't see anything wrong with having a cake in the car (we actually encourage it), we're pretty sure they meant "care."
However, we're sure whoever wrote this was just very busy or having an off day. These types of signs are usually pretty accurate in their spelling, but nobody is perfect.
Sure About That?
You know you're good at writing signs when you have two entries on a list like this. Another funny sign from El Arroyo in Texas, this place is apparently known for making some of the best signs around. This one reads: "I have never faked a sarcasm in my life." Of course, they are doing just that with this sign, but it does require you to think for a second.
You also have to read it twice in order to read it right, or at least, we did. Anyway, we now want to visit this place.
One of These Is Not Like the Others
Remember those tests in school where you had to pick the one option that didn't fit in with the others? Well, that's what this sign reminds us of. This place had to put an escalator safety sign up, but they managed to sneak in a weird rule among all the other stuff. It reads: "No pushchairs. No running. No competitive dog grooming. No heavy luggage". Did you happen to catch that third one?
As if anyone would think about competitively grooming their dog on the escalator. Everyone knows that's something you only do while riding in an elevator.
Please Accept the Terms and Conditions Before Knocking
There are few things more annoying than getting a knock on the door and opening up to find someone trying to pitch you an idea or a product. Luckily, someone out there seems to have come up with a warning sign for people like that. The sign warns people that they will be charged $50 per minute for the homeowner's time. Not only that, but the charge must be paid in advance. This person really thought of everything.
The sign lists those trying to pitch a product, a religion, or a fundraising event as having to pay. However, we can't help but feel sorry for anyone wanting to sell Girl Scout cookies to this household.
So Many Double-Meanings Here
As this sign shows, you need to be creative when owning and operating your own business. Someone who owns a photo studio that does photography, framing, and printing hung a sign telling potential customers, "We can shoot your wife & frame your mother-in-law." If that isn't enough for you, then "We can hang them too!" it reads. Of course, they're referring to printing and framing services, but it's a tongue-in-cheek way of getting people's attention.
And in all honesty, the originality of this sign would probably be enough to convince us to purchase something from them, even if it's not a specific shot of a loved one.
This Toilet Sign Went Full Savage on the Gentlemen
This is another great sign for parents or restaurants. It pretty much just details how to use the toilet properly, but with some biting humor. There's a lot here, but the first half reads: "If you lift it up... Put it down. If it runs out... Replace it. If you miss it... Wipe it. If you're finished... Flush it. If it smells... Spray it." Those are generally good rules, but the second half of the sign is even better.
It advises women to "Please remain seated for the whole performance" while telling men to "stand closer; it may be shorter than you think." Talk about a sign that isn't having any of it.
Guess You Just Have to Make a U-Turn
Driving behind large trucks on the interstate or highway can be dangerous, especially when they're carrying cargo that can come flying out into the middle of the road. Because of this, they usually have signs on the back that warn you as much. However, these drivers found themselves in a sticky situation after two trucks with conflicting signs got out in front of them. The truck on the right advises drivers to "keep left," while the truck on the left has a sign that says "do not follow."
There's really not much for these drivers to do besides just slow down and wait for one of the trucks to overtake the other and get in the same lane.
Maybe Literacy Night Should Be Every Night
We can only hope this sign was written this way on purpose. Otherwise, some parents might be switching their children's schools pretty soon. The school sign reads: "Leteracy night." Obviously, it's supposed to say "Literacy night." And if it was on purpose, then it's a pretty good joke. Either way, we're sure they'll have a couple more parents show up now than if they'd just spelled it right.
Perhaps that was the point? We aren't too sure, but if so, then it's good to see educators thinking out of the box to get parents more involved than they normally would be.
That'll Definitely Grab People's Attention
This is probably the most deceitful sign on this list, but it's also one of the funniest. A garage put up a sign that reads: "Girls, girls, girls," in a tiered style you might see adorning a particular type of club. However, right underneath, they wrote, "Just kidding, oil changes." That's one way to grab the attention of potential customers. However, it's also one way to leave them sorely disappointed.
Even so, we'd probably pull in here to get an oil change, considering you don't usually see inventive signs like this posted outside of garages.
But You Could Look Better
This sign is really genius or just really a troll move, depending on how you look at it. Someone wrote a message on the bathroom wall in place of where the mirror should be that says, "you look fine." That's great and all, but what if you really want to check and make sure that you don't have anything on your face? Then again, the message is somehow really reassuring just by itself.
We don't know, but we're sure it cuts down on the time people spend standing in front of the sink and looking at themselves in the mirror to make sure every little thing looks okay.
A Judgement-Free Zone
It can be tough for your furry friend when it's hot outside. They need to stay constantly hydrated, especially while out on long walks. Luckily, there are people out there that are willing to offer a helping hand and leave a bowl of water out for passing dogs or just people that happen to be thirsty. This sign reads: Water for your dog, or short people with low standards... we don't judge".
That's certainly a nice thing to do. And in all honesty, cities really do need to start making public water fountains a thing again. They're probably not very sanitary, but at least they allow people access to free water.
Life Hack: Get Your Car Neutered for Free
This is the first sign on this list to deal with parking. A veterinary clinic put this sign up to make sure the spots were reserved for customers. It advises anyone who isn't going to the vet to not park there, lest they want to get "neutered." The best thing about this sign probably isn't even the wording but the serious font that makes it look like any other no-parking sign.
If you didn't read it all the way through, you'd probably think it was just like any other sign. However, that's just a part of the charm, and we're glad someone did read all the way through and snapped a photo.
An Opportunistic Pub Owner
As we've said before, you have to get inventive if you're a business owner. This bar owner spotted a road-closed sign and immediately lept into action. They walked and placed their own sign next to the road closure warning that read: "Pub open tho." They might have a spelling mistake in there, but at least they added a little arrow to make sure that people knew where to go.
You've got to admire that kind of quick thinking. However, it might not be the best idea to stop by a pub if you're driving and on your way somewhere.
It's All in the Fine Print
Coyotes have become a nuisance across the U.S.They're moving into cities, and they're extremely difficult to get rid of. That might be why someone from the California park service came up with this sign. It looks like any other sign warning people to stay away from wild animals until you look closer and read the fine print. It advises people to call authorities if they see a coyote "carrying a box marked 'ACME.'"
That and the rest of the fine print are clear references to Wile E. Coyote from the Looney Tunes. Of course, they list off a couple of more "suspicious" activities, such as a coyote in possession of a catapult or holding a "detour" sign.
What's Wrong With Potatoes?
Potatoes are probably the most underappreciated vegetable, and this sign just proves it. The sign was originally written in a language other than English and then translated. The translated part reads: "You are my love my angle. Don't treat me like potato". The sentiment is kind of nice, and we can guess that the word angle is meant to be "angel." But what in the world is potato supposed to refer to?
This would also make a good name for a song, or if you're feeling really adventurous, a tattoo. Bonus points if you also get the characters from the other language.
If You're Looking for a Sign to Go Pour Yourself a Glass...
If you've ever found yourself not feeling like going to work for no particular reason besides you'd just rather stay home and do nothing, then this sign is for you. It reads: "Weather too depressing for coffee. We're going home early to drink wine in bed & watch Futurama reruns. We appreciate your understanding". It's also signed by the entire coffee shop team. We suppose there are worse ways to spend a day off than watching Futurama reruns.
In fact, if there ever was a reason for taking a random day off work, then this is probably the way to go. We just have one question: what kind of weather is coffee not appropriate for?